feeling heartbreak
You know when you're in love, it is the best feeling in the world. The things that remind you of that person throughout the day brings a smile to your face and you light up brighter than the sun.
Well, when you are going through a break-up all those little things and moments still remind you of this person but give you grief and heartache. Songs, phrases, little things in everyday become a way of torture.
Today is hard day for me to process, I have this terrible anger inside where I just want to start a fight or be mean. I want to hit a punching bag to let out all this anger or scream so hard my voice goes away. I just want to get in my car listen to loud music and drive to anywhere and scream and let out all my tears to where I will no longer have tears to shed for you.
Your silence to me is baffling, I look at your social media and you look like everything is perfect and okay with you. How is it that this hurts me more to where I can't even eat?
Yesterday I felt strong and powerful within myself and today I can't stop thinking about you.
Today you plague every space through my mind. I hate you today because of how much you are missed. I want to hear your voice. I am trying to be strong but the tears are seeping out. How is it that your silence hurts me? Why do I feel that my absence has no effect on you and only makes me feel invalid and makes me wonder my significance to you.
Today I hate you with a power of a thousand suns.
Today I hate you for letting me love you.
Today I hate you for meaning so much.
I am not strong today, I am trying to just hold myself together when all I did was call and hearing your voice was the calm to my storm and now the thought of you creates havoc.
I hate loving you today.
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